Coffee Table Thoughts: I couldn’t find a better name so I numbered it instead: 6

Welcome dear readers, yeah, all 4 of you! This time around, there is a bit of change in what I have written. Usually, I would select a few points on which to discuss. This time it is sort of Running Diary but without the track of time.

I am bringing you the Smackdown thoughts while I was watching the same on my cell-phone over a stolen wi-fi connection.

The opening segment saw Teddy Long giving away the Elimination Chamber participants. Being a Royal Rumble winner is such a curse. Since you are going to get the opportunity at Wrestlemania, you don’t get the chance to win the World Championship before that. That is why Sheamus is not in the match.

Mark Henry manages to be both heel-ish and funny at the same time. Last week, he said something about love-fest, hurt feelings and Napoleon Complex. This week, he is asking for being excluded from the Elimination Chamber and given the Championship match tonight only. Yeah, right. Sheamus makes the save for Teddy Long and then goes on to say that he has not decided about which championship he is after.

Lol@ Cody saying there is a parallel between Ultimate Warrior and Sheamus and also Teddy Long tonight because half the time he cannot understand what either one of them is saying. Cody put over himself and said that he was the MVP of the match, which the announcers agreed to.

Simple yet effective match between Cody and Sheamus. It wasn't anything more than hitting a few moves - didn't involve much of chemistry but was enjoyable. Cody's moon sault and the new finishing manouvre of Sheamus were enjoyable and a treat for the eyes. So was the kick by Cody to Sheamus in the outside.

I'm not looking forward to Randy Orton vs Wade Barret actually. Despite Wade Barret trying to make this feud important by talking about it every single time he gets the mike, I haven't been able to
get into this feud. But that may just be me. I'm not at all excited about this match. I sometime wonder how many feuds in the past year have been built with the same formula - match after match after match?

Cody's expressions of being delusional were a thing of beauty after he lost his match to Sheamus and still standing there.

Great Khali continues to be amusing with his disabilities. I seriously don't understand the hate towards him. It's not like Mason Ryan not wrestling well because he could if he tried. That is not the case with The Great Khali. The guy has serious physical disabilities in that he cannot move his giant self with a half-decent speed because his legs are hardly able to hold that weight. He is a special attraction. Don't know why they gave him the World Championship though, that could have been avoided. But he did become a big name in India after all.

I knew this Drew McIntyre storyline wasn't going to end in a bad way. So now, he needs to find another way of impressing Teddy Long. Interesting! What will he do? Find a tag team partner? Dance? Sing? Various possibilities!

Santino & Duggan stuff was hilarious. Teddy Long giving them a match against the tag champions so that they leave his office, haha! Nice video package about Iron Mike Tyson being inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame. That celebrity wing in the Hall just became that much more important.

Putting Santino Marrela on Smackdown is the best thing for him. He clearly seems misplaced on Raw but he is regaining his charm and the crowd response by appearing in Smackdown. Speed-Walking!

Absolutely love how Primo and Epico switch their roles while in a match. The person, who just tagged the other, goes out of the ring by jumping over the top rope while the person who was just tagged in gets into the ring by jumping over the top rope. Both at the same time. They are adding little bits to their tag team which the former champs Kofi and Evan were doing too. To a small extent, I remember that the now extinct tag team of David Otunga and Michael McGuillycutty doing some of their additions too. These little things can go a long way in building the tag division. But we all know that isn't going to be the case. There have been no visible steps taken to build the tag division even after the news broke out that the new man in power Triple H is interested in building the tag division back.

Santino Marrela should reduce the use of that running head-butt jump that he does. That thing can cause brutal consequences.

Michael Cole interviewing a not-yet-big-time heel Daniel Bryan? That's awkward. There is a possibility of the biggest double turn in the WWE since that Wrestlemania 13 Hart-Austin bloodbath thing.

No, it did not happen. Daniel Bryan simply told Cole to leave the ring after taking the mike in his hands. Then he went on to give a speech about why one should be a vegan.

Booker T – “Big Show trying to hold on to Bryan at the Royal Rumble event, but in the end, gravity prevailed.” Awesome!

Wow! That Daniel Bryan beating was satisfying. Big Show threw his body like a toy and I was enjoying every second of it.

Macho King had Miss Elizabeth. Daniel Bryan has AJ Lee. AJ Lee is face. Daniel Bryan is a heel. Is it really going that route? (Phrasing Shane)

And lol @ Daniel Bryan asking her if she's okay and that he will protect her. Yes sir, she is okay. Wouldn’t you ask her while she was still in the ring at the same time as Big Show and try to protect her at that time? No because you were too busy running away from Big Show. You sir, are a....I shall better not complete that sentence.

Randy Orton has been considered as not so good on mic and one of the most boring. But I haven't found him boring in any way. I don't find him entertaining either but he seems quite solid. He was asked whether his approach in the ring against Wade Barret going to be conservative. Now boring would be if he said he was going to avenge Wade Barret for what he did to him. But he says that he doesn't have problem with Wade Barret for throwing him on the stairs because if he had an opportunity, he would have done the same. What he does have a problem with is Wade Barret proclaiming that he has ended Randy Orton's character. He will not hold anything back in his match tonight. I recall one other time when he was asked whether he would go after the world championship. This was after he lost his match against Mark Henry. He said he is no Christian and is not going to keep begging for the opportunity for the world championship. But if he has
to go through the entire locker room to gain that opportunity, he will. He always comes up with something smart to say. It is much different than the usual angry in an instant reactions that we get
from so many other superstars. One particular gentleman that has been always involved in that state is Kane and I have largely disliked his work through out the 2000's where he seems to be after someone for no apparent reason. I don't feel his anger. I can not relate to his character. That anger seems forced. I can, however, identify with Randy Orton's character. He seems a person who has his legs on the ground. And that's why the anger that he shows in the ring is more believable. He gradually reaches that stage of madness. Even if he goes in that extra territory in first few minutes in the match, it is still a gradual progression. And now, I'm actually excited about the match between him and Wade Barret.

That was interesting slow beating that Randy Orton was lashing on Wade Barret and then he.......goes on to high-five a very young kid in the crowd? I love Orton!!!!

Orton had set up the table in the middle of the ring, to super plex Wade Barret over it. But it was he who got smashed onto it. Orton kicks out but he is in so much pain. Shit, that streching of Orton by Pole thing that Wade Barret did was wicked.

That was a very hard hitting and entertaining match.

Daniel Bryan coming to the ring and showing off while Orton was still celebrating was hilarious. The amused look on the face of Randy Orton was entertaining. Next week, we will be seeing Randy Orton vs Daniel Bryan. If it continues to a feud, it could make Daniel Bryan. I could sense the excitement while Randy looked onto Daniel Bryan. Next week should be fun.

I would like to add a few words about Matt Striker. I think he is handling the backstage interview gig quite brilliantly and in a way that no other backstage interviewer has ever done. He phrases his questions in such a language that it all becomes very interesting and hard hitting instead of the usual ‘Your thoughts on the same’. He is creating quite a niche for himself as well as for the job itself.

That’s all, folks!

Mick Foley, Royal Rumble, Ring Ka King and much more!!

A Swerve Rant

(This was written before Royal Rumble)

I can’t understand the WWE’s love for the old-timers. Why does it keep bringing those who have retired for years? Why do they have to rely on the established stars to get the ratings hike? Why don’t they establish new stars instead of bringing in the old ones and giving them so much hype that the younger ones look dumb? To add insult to the injury, Mick Foley has now been added in the Royal Rumble match. The match that can give you a good enough rub by being there just for a second. He is there to take away one very important spot of the total 30 spots available. There are already rumoured returns of the stars that can actually wrestle but haven’t been wrestling the whole year long and now we have to deal with this. There are wrestlers over there in the WWE that work their asses of to earn whatever money they earn and suffer injuries without even being put on televised segments, let alone the televised matches. There are Superstars there that have been working hard every week to be seen on the internet by an audience much much smaller than even the TNA Impact Wrestlings’. This was their golden opportunity and now it is going to be taken up by Mick Foley. And what is he going to do with his Rumble spot anyways? Remember that last Rumble he participated in as a surprise entrant? He eliminated Randy Orton and along with Randy, he eliminated himself without even thinking for a second what was that he was giving up. That is the value of the Rumble spot in his eyes. Not even worth of a second thought – just throw it away like a good habit.

And all this for what? For letting his two children see him perform? Oh come on Foley, your career is a storied one, you can show them all the tapes of the wrestling events and vignettes you have been a part of and you can even get all of those videos for free from the WWE management. Hell, you can even force or persuade them to make a DVD for yourself, which can be a career DVD now that all the three organisations that were big part of your career are owned by them. Why do you want to kick someone’s stomach to be a star in your children’s’ eyes?

Why would anyone of the WWE Universe care for that? Why would they even anticipate your entry in the Rumble when it is known from the get go that you are not going to win this? I mean, sure, you are not going to win this, right? You will come in and just like that, go out of the Rumble.

“ No no that’s good, that’s good and you know what? That could happen. I could walk in, I could get thrown over the top rope, be eliminated and look at it as the biggest mistake of my life. That could happen. That’s one of the elements I love about the Rumble, you can’t predict it. There’s an element of danger, even....even magic in the air. But who’s to say that things may not turn out to be different? Who’s to say that I might not draw a number in my favour, who’s to say that the same magic that existed on three different occasions when I became the WWE Champion won’t be present on that night at the Royal Rumble? You see I do, I do want to perform in front of my two children. Mickey and Hughie would love to see Dad give his very best. But if you think I am only in there to participate and be one of the thirty members, you are looking at me in the wrong way. You see my aspirations are a little more than ambitious. I’m not just in the Royal Rumble to be in it, I’m in the Royal Rumble to win it.”

-       Early contender for the most underrated promo of the year

There is this intensity, intensity that he always brings out by going round and round and then gradually coming to the point he is trying to make. I don’t know whether the dialogues were written, but after this amazing shining promo of Mick, what did Dolph do? Did he gave the same level of intensity back? Did he fumble?

He didn’t do either of it, or in a better way, he did both of it. You see, that few seconds of silence that Dolph had after this rumbling from Mick Foley and then coming up with ‘That’s great Mick, that’s what every Superstar wishes and aims to do......’ .....don’t look at the words because they weren’t really that important. He understood that Mick had just turned the entire crowd on. He knew and understood that what Mick Foley said was indeed great, the emotions that he showed were right out of his heart. And he did the right thing to turn the pressure a few notches down - And then pumping it up big time by ending it with, ‘I’m going to explain you this as straight as I can, Mick. It’s over. Go home. Buy a new shirt, eat a salad and just GO AWAY.’

There were some great lines in there by Dolph. The comedy ones were really great. The stuff about, ‘Hope Daddy didn’t eat our lunch today’ was some stuff even your enemy would laugh at.

Mick Foley won this thing – this duel – but Dolph didn’t just lose out either. But I think there is still something lacking there, there is still some steps that are to be taken by Dolph towards perfection. May be a lot of what is lacking in him is just as a result of the WWE booking 101 where the person winning isn’t really winning it. May be he will get that once booked well or in other words, when booked as a face. I am not able to identify this, this...for lack of a better word, this imperfection that Dolph has that stops me from liking him that much, but I have a long guess that it may be that intensity – the one which he has shown, and did show here too, but still not pumped it up full time.

Coming back to Mick Foley – he is such an intense guy. It’s no secret that he is no longer a wrestler that he was (“Was never that good to begin with”) – his small fight that took place in the Raw proved that. But he still is the damn best promo guy that ever can be.

THE TNA SMALL BROTHER

This Saturday the first episode of the show ‘Ring ka King’ which is India based aired. I am excited to see this.

Last year one wrestling show of Indian background was shown on the same channel, ‘Colors’, but I had missed the show for the most part. Whatever I had seen, was very very phony. The show was based on the concept that an Indian team had gone on the tour of the Africa and had to wrestle against the opposition team. I wasn’t aware of the any of the wrestlers there and didn’t find the action to be crisp. Though, whatever action I had seen, wasn’t all that bad – just not crisp enough – looked too amateurish.

This year, it began with a bang. Harbhajan Singh, the Indian Cricketer and one of the finest bowlers in the world hosted the first show and introduced us to the various wrestlers and even introduced the ‘Ring Ka King’ World Championship.

There is something you need to know about the Sport that is Cricket and the importance of being an Indian Cricketer. This country – India – my country – literally eats, breathes and lives Cricket. That’s really the only sport where we have continuously excelled. Sure there are some other Sports and Sportsmen who have represented our country well and brought some championship – like Leander Paes recently and for a better part of the last decade, but they haven’t been loved as much as the Cricketers. Cricketers are the most loved people in this country.

And they are the most hated too. Damn, our Cricket team just got squashed in a 4 match series the worse way than Alex Riley got defeated by Brodus Clay. This appearance by Harbhajan Singh will surely get some much needed eyeballs for the show – but Man – would that guy have got some heavy beeps beeps by the whole load of Indian House Hold!

What is the most exciting thing about this Project is that they have added some really good names to their roster and it shows that they see a bright future in India for this business. The crowd at the stadium/auditorium was huge - 1000 or something which is high as compared to the Indian Standards when you take into consideration that Wrestling is not so popular in here.

The Roster

Chavo Guerrero – introduced as the nephew of Legendary Eddie Guerrero. There will be some exciting matches possible with this underrated performer.

Dr Nick Dinsemore – He had been one of my favourite wrestlers as ‘Eugene’. Here, he is a Doctor who was thrown out of the college because he always used to do some weird experiments in the lab. His trademark foreign object is going to be – an injection! He has some of those Eugene-ish characteristics and mannerisms. I liked his old school wrestling in the WWE back then, he didn’t seem to do much in the ring this night though.

Sonjay Dutt – I have heard a lot about him. I have heard that he is pretty good and was one of the important players of TNA. I am yet to see any of his work though - which remains the biggest of the crimes that I have committed so far in my life, apart from not studying well enough. His character and mannerisms are quite – silly, amusing and mad-ish.

Mahabali Veera – He is from Punjab. Punjab is sort of like Texas of US (from what I have seen from movies). Hot-headed people. It is also the place from where numerous war heroes of India have come from. Any one from Punjab is going to be well received and that is proved here as he instantly becomes a fan favourite. He wrestled Nick Dinsemore. His work isn’t all that great as the Powerbomb that he gave to Nick was sloppy. But some of the punches and the striking offence was quite impressive.

Scott Steiner – He was introduced as the biggest Badman on the earth. He cut his usual promo which I didn’t understand but enjoyed.

Matt Morgan – He was introduced as the most important part of the show, the seven footer. Harbhajan Singh even said that he is a fan of him.

Brutus Magnus – He instantly began the feud with Matt Morgan on Morgan being considered as the most likely winner of the Championship belt. Apparently, Magnus, Stenier and Sonjay Dutt are a stable and there is some ‘Boss’ too.

There was American Adonis too. With his Adonis Lock. You know, the Master Lock. His manager, ‘Shera’ seems well-built and may become a wrestler going forward.

I couldn’t continue watching this as my nephew decided that it was a good time to watch Mr Bean.

.

Royal Rumble Thoughts

In one word – Underwhelming.

The three announcers each getting a spot was a mistake. The stuff with the announcers has never been funny and WWE can’t seem to be on the same page with IWC on this. There were three precious spots that could have been used for some better workers. I liked the Jerry Lawler entry, it was a nice touch. Booker T stuff was okay. Michael Cole stuff was funny too. Individually, their performances were quite good but when you consider the overall effect that it had on the Rumble match, you can’t help but to get angry.

Jim Duggan stuff was nice and crowd seemed to be behind him.

I didn’t find the Mick Foley stuff interesting. (Swerve!!!)

The Miz wasn’t made in the 43+ minutes that he was in the ring. His initial promo was not a word different from what he has been saying for past two years. He wasn’t seen doing much of anything else in the Rumble match. I am disappointed in him. People had been berating Alberto Del Rio for the ‘Destiny’ promos where in fact he had stopped using that for months. Miz just completely underperformed in the match. I am wondering whether the spark that we had seen in him during last year and a probable future star – was a mistake?!

Cody Rhodes did some eventful things and was involved in the elimination of both Mick Foley and Jim Duggan – main eventers for the night. I think he utilised his time pretty well.

Dolph Ziggler was nice while he lasted and took that slam from Kharma like a Champ. But I didn’t like the fact that Big Show eliminated him so early – well not so early, but he should have been in the final four and final three.

The lack of John Cena, Kane, Zack Ryder hurt the match. Primo, Epico and Hunico needn’t be there in the Rumble either. They did some impressive moves here and there but there was no need of all the three being included there especially knowing that a certain Canadian Wrestler was ready to Rumble.

May be Miz could have shown some spark had he and Cody not been eliminated at the same time by the Big Show. It was just too anti-climatic.

The Final Four and Final Three lasted for a total of how many seconds? That was clearly a big big letdown. If there was anything more disappointing than this during the whole event – it was nothing. The match just lost the appeal by so many quick eliminations. Miz, Cody, Dolph, Big Show and Randy Orton in under a minute or two. Poor, poor booking.

Final Two was the highlight of the night. I loved how Chris Jericho’s legs came so close to the floor every time. It was almost as if he was deliberately doing the same. The near falls (You saw what I did there?) were very interesting. The exchange between the two of various moves was quite entertaining.

I think it’s a nice choice they made. Sheamus has been on a roll for over six months now and that too without doing much of anything. It will be exciting to see what path he chooses. I think we haven’t seen the scenario of the Royal Rumble winner changing brands for quite some time. I think it occurred in 2004 the last time and probably the only time? It would be quite different than the usual course we all are predicting. And maybe this is the risk that the WWE might take?

Dolph Ziggler is moving out of the title picture, clearly. If Chris Jericho is finalised as the person to face CM Punk, then I want Dolph Ziggler to be added in the too. I am sure both CM Punk and Dolph Ziggler can move upwards in popularity by feuding with each other the same way that The Rock and Austin did.

SmackDown Main Event

Three people are involved in the main event of the SmackDown as recently as today morning (Yesterday night for most of you). Add the returning Randy Orton. Now add the Royal Rumble winner Sheamus. Add Wade Barret even if you want to add Randy Orton. Now you add the person who made the summer of 2011 worth every dime that you spent on it – Christian. Now that Mark Henry is injured, subtract him. Since Randy Orton and Wade Barret are involved in a feud against each other, subtract them too. Add Shaq and now subtract both Shaq and Big Show. Let Sheamus be the one who has been sent on the search of ‘X’ and so he is subtracted too. What do we have? We have a Wrestlemania match! One can always dream!

Regardless of the wide gap between the permutations and combinations of the card for Wrestlemania between the optimists and the pessimists, and regardless of how underwhelming Royal Rumble was, the Elimination Chamber is surely going to be a great show. Especially with the Smackdown brand as there are indeed so many believable players right now and a title change can very well take place at that event and possibly any of the six men that will be involved in the Elimination Chamber match can walk out of the Chamber – either the World Heavyweight Champion or the Number 1 Contender for the same.

Tag Team Championship

When the USOs and the Hart Dynasty began feuding with each other, we thought the dark ages of the no meaning tag team championships have come to an end. The team of Santiono Marrela and Vladimir Kozlov also gave us the same hope. Cody Rhodes and Drew McIntyre. We lost all hopes.

Then after a long time, a tag team had been formed between Kofi Kingston and Evan Bourne. It seemed like they were on the verge of making the tag titles relevant again. It became clear soon after, however, that they were not going to make the tag team wrestling relevant again. They had no damn competition. Even Awesome Truth could not make much of an impact. And then Evan Bourne did his thing. We lost all hopes.

Then Evan Bourne came back. There was a team of Colons and another team of Electric Bikers. And then a title change took place at a house show. We were all so excited and even Jim Ross mentioned that this is the next step in making the tag titles relevant again. May be that is how we can bring back the prestige to the titles by making every show count, by adding that element of surprise and unpredictability. Until we found out the reason for the title change. We lost all hopes.

There is another hope. SanToshi. Or YoshiTino. Whichever way you like. I know it is not within their capacity to make the whole division relevant again. But they can provide a much needed fresh air to the tag team scene. They won’t be putting on those five star classic matches as they will hardly be given any time. But whatever little time they get, can be utilised well as the Colons are great athletes. The Hunico Kapacho Team can also put on some moves. Yoshi has his kicks and Santino has his Cobra. USOs have their Haka. But the most important part is that Santino will always be in some sort of storyline. If not against others, may be among themselves. Whichever way it goes, it will be entertaining while it lasts.

And then the step towards greater good can be taken which is – either make some investment in the tag team storylines, add the Kings of Wrestling and other such tag teams to the roster and make them fight with passion – or let the tag titles take the same route the Criserweight Championship took. Go into oblivion, never to be found again. That is after it is won by Hornswoggle.

A Wild Guess

Finally, there is a wild guess that I want to make. It is concerning the ongoing feud between Kane and John Cena.

And my guess is – Zack Ryder will face Kane at Wrestlemania. Zack Ryder is not going to ask for a United States Title anytime soon. I am pretty sure that it is the revenge that he is going to opt for instead of the ‘Pretty much irrelevant’ Championship belt. And it all sets quite beautifully.

Manchester United Survey

Hi Guys


I need some help with the Manchester United Survey. I would be glad if anyone can answer these questions. These are India-related questions but anyone can participate. Thank you :-)


1. Do you believe Manchester United to be the biggest sports brand name in the world? Please explain your answer.

2. What was it that attracted you to become a fan of Manchester United and not another globally recognised football club? Is there anything unique about the club? (these questionnaires are for MUFC fans, to try and answer as if you are too if you’re not)

3. Do you believe the club has made sufficient efforts to build a relationship with you and make you feel a part of the global Manchester United family?

4. Why did you decide to become a part of an online brand community dedicated to Manchester United? 

5. Has being part of an online community helped you become a bigger and more loyal fan? If so, how and in what ways?

6. How important is the fact that Manchester United is based in England in terms of being a passionate fan of the club?

7. In what ways are Manchester United so well known in your country? Is it mainly focused on media, television or is the club now embedded into Asian culture?

8. How big is the club compared to other sporting brands in your country, with regards to both domestic franchises and global ones?

9. Why do you think the club has had so much success? How do you expect their brand to perform in Asia in the future?


Once again, I will appreciate it a lot if you can help me with this Survey :-)

January 9, 2012

Coffee Table Thoughts

Why Dolph Ziggler vs CM Punk took place

On the first episode of Monday Night Raw (or Raw Supershow), the WWE Title was on the line. CM Punk had to defend his WWE Title against Dolph Ziggler. There were various opinions on why this match was taking place.

Recent news reports suggested that the segments of the Raw involving CM Punk were not getting as much as expected views. This is after he has sort of become ‘the man’ of the red brand and carried the WWE Championship with him for a few months. So the obvious conclusion that people drew was that the Management had decided to take the title away from him due to poor ratings. This led to many a angry rants on many a message boards.

Some others believed that it had more to do with Dolph Ziggler than with CM Punk. You see, Mr Perfection has been giving Match of the Nights for the whole year, has been cutting entertaining and engaging promos through-out the year and has generally been showing a lot of charisma. I personally haven’t found his promos to be outstanding but he has indeed been taking a lot of punishment in the ring, has been involved in interesting matches and seems to be on the cusp of big things. Having Vickie Guerrero as his Valet/Manager doesn’t hurt his chances either. So when Dolph Ziggler was announced, all his well-wishers had started predicting a WWE Title reign for him on the very first day of 2012.

I personally thought that this match had neither to do anything with CM Punk generating poor ratings nor anything with Dolph Ziggler being perfect. It wasn’t about CM Punk or Dolph Ziggler but about The Miz and John Morrison. It’s that simple, really.

By putting the WWE Title match on the first day of the year for two consecutive years, WWE has started another tradition right before our very own unsuspecting eyes. In 10 years time, we would be witnessing the vignettes of The Miz vs John Morrison and other highlights from 9 other editions of the first day matches for WWE Title and the legacy involving it.

Umpteenth Column about Daniel Bryan

I didn’t know him. I haven’t seen the 10 years of his independent wrestling career. I haven’t seen any of his matches that won him the ‘Best Technical Wrestler’ Award by Wrestling Observer Newsletter for 5 years.

I first read about him during the first season of NXT. I read his praises on various parts of ‘IWC’. This was the time I was taking my entire wrestling intake through reading and not by actually watching shows. I read how he tried to kill someone in the commentary by a tie. I read that he was fired. I read how WWE was so dumb for doing this nonsense of an injustice. I read how everyone had already predicted that the seventh entrant for Team WWE against Team Nexus would be Daniel Bryan. I read that he got a nice pop. I read about his promo against The Miz. I read they had a good chemistry. I read that he became US Champion. I read how awesome his match against The Miz and John Morrison was. I read that both he and Dolph Ziggler had put not one, not two but three wrestling clinics.

I then saw his matches. I heard his promos whenever he got the chance. I heard his entrance music. It was classic. I heard his second entrance music. It was classic. I heard his third entrance music. It was classic.

I saw him getting dropped of the Wrestlemania card. I saw him getting invisible (Paradox).

And then came the night. It was in June or July. I had predicted a winner. Daniel Bryan wasn’t in the list of winner that I had predicted. He won. He became the Smackdown Money in the Bank winner. I was disappointed.

No, No – don’t get me wrong. While the above short timeline shows how little I know about this guy and how I came to know about him, don’t for a second think that I was not a fan of him. I was a fan of him before I saw his face. I was a fan of him before I saw him fight. He was a 10 year veteran. He was considered as the best technical wrestler. He was of small stature. These attributes were enough for me to become his fan. When I actually saw him wrestle, I was in awe. When I heard his promos, I saw charisma. I felt that the very fact that he didn’t have charisma WAS charisma – it gave him a character, different from all other characters. I liked how he used his story and logic in his promos. I literally loved this guy.

That is until he won the Money in the Bank. Sheamus, The Miz, John Cena, Randy Orton, Kane, Big Show, Chris Jericho, Dolph Ziggler, Jack Swagger, Christian, CM Punk, Rey Mysterio, Mark Henry and Daniel Bryan. 13 Former-Current World-WWE Champions. This is excluding Triple H, Undertaker, The Rock and Kevin Nash because they will not be involved in any Title matches. Add to this list, Cody Rhodes and Wade Barret, both of whom are on the cusp of main-eventing or becoming the World Champions. And we get what is the problem with the current product. Oh also, I don’t know, I am unable to remember, but there was some other World Champion too. In recent times. He had won something else very important too. Royal Rumble may be. Santino Marela?

The Miz had what, a single United States Title reign? Same goes for Daniel Bryan. This and they go on to become World Champions. We are already hearing people wanting to see Zack Ryder become the WWE Champion by December 2012. By this rate, in 2-3 years time, it would be difficult to find a superstar in WWE that is not a World Champion.

Look, I get that it is good for Daniel Bryan. I understand that his years of efforts have justified his title win. May be the character change that is in the works may make him the most hated heel in wrestling since Hulk Hogan, but I wanted to see his struggle in the WWE. I wanted to see him in the mid-card. I wanted to see him wrestle his way through the glass-ceiling, so to speak.

Nevertheless, I will enjoy his reign, the development of his character and his matches.

The Wild-Card Tournament

I have missed all the impact wrestling shows of November-December. Not because I thought that the shows were getting boring or because I was protesting against the heel turn of Bobby Roode. I was finding it difficult to get the time to see it. On top of that I couldn’t find a site where I can download the TNA PPVs for we, which isn’t that difficult for the WWE PPVs.

Regardless, there is news coming in that a tournament is currently underway to decide the number one contenders for the Tag Team Titles. And apparently, the team of Samoa Joe and Magnus have won the said tournament. So, they will go on to have a match for the Tag Team Titles against the current champions Matt Morgan and Crimson.

This is one of the reasons why I love TNA - The tournaments. A tournament is a story in itself; it can evolve many stories at the same time. It also brings credibility to the final price. These tournaments give the much needed sports like feel to the business of sports entertainment.

TNA has had a X-Division Tournament, a World Heavyweight Championship Tournament (Bound for Glory series- which btw would have been the best story of the year 2011 for me at least, if not for some of the shenanigans pulled during the tournament) and now there is this Tag Team Tournament. And this one is called the Wild Card Tournament, where in the participants did not chose their partners or something like that. I will come with more details when I look up some of the past episodes for this tournament.  

I would so like to see something like this in WWE and that too for Tag Team titles. Come on WWE, still the idea!

Someone is finally out of the doghouse!

After spending much of the year 2012 out of the WWE TV, finally Drew McIntyre was seen on WWE TV and was given some segments to showcase his charisma as well as an opportunity to wrestle on TV!

Don’t get fooled by the loss or two that he got in these episodes though. He was given time to showcase his charisma and give the management a reason to care. I think he passed with flying colours in doing that. He is in a storyline, for God’s sake! That cannot be said about the Tag Team champions or the Divas Champion!

In a matter of months, people will go all mad behind this man and waiting for a push to – you guessed it right – the World Championship.

Coffee Table Thoughts : Raw Opening Segment, John Laurinaitis and #facepalm

Coffee Table Thoughts : Raw Opening Segment, John Laurinaitis and #facepalms

Raw Opening Segment and the WWE Championship

I love clusterfucks! I love them especially if they build towards something special or fresh. WWE Championship belt has been doing a lot of travelling job recently from one shoulder to another, I agree, but the last feud between CM Punk and Alberto Del Rio has been so uninteresting that it felt it was going on for ages. Alberto Del Rio has proven to be a wrong bet at the top of the card but his feud with CM Punk shouldn’t be over this soon. There should be a proper pay-off. In the segment, he held his own, the way he can. He was never going to outshine three other probably the best talkers in the entire roster, but he managed to stay there and relevant.

The segment began with John Cena. He once again dodged the urge to respond to the hate that was shown to him by the Universe and the slap that was hit by the legend Rowdy Roddy Piper. He just had to start with that slap, so he did, but then quickly went about business. He emphasised on the importance of the WWE Championship and quickly included himself in the title hunt. His match with Zack Ryder was a great social experiment according to me and John Cena did a good job of building Zack Ryder.

It was great to see The Miz in there with the other wanna be contenders. He hasn’t seemed as important in quite a while. The last time he was important was when he was making Alex Riley a star. He showed through his mic skills, not going overboard, that he deserved to be at the very top of the card. His forgettable run as a tag team with R Truth is finally over and he can concentrate on more important things now.

But perhaps the best of the lot was the introduction of Dolph Ziggler in the WWE Championship scene. He was in the World Heavyweight Championship at about this time last year and earlier in the current year which also involved a very very brief run as the World Champion. But his move from Smackdown to Raw had hurt him a lot. After struggling and slowly moving to the top of the card after years of effort in Smackdown, he had finally got his opportunity in the sunshine but that was not to last longer. And since coming to Raw, he has been in the mid-card scene only. He has established himself firmly in the role of go to guy, but I feel he needs to move on. This time hopefully, his stay at the top won’t be a one night stand. Well, Dolph didn’t exactly got included in the WWE Title picture, but he is getting there, possibly to stay there.

From the looks of it, Alberto Del Rio is surely going out of the WWE Championship picture; John Cena is already out and probably will stay out. That leaves us with CM Punk, Miz and Dolph Ziggler and it is amusing. Whatever the card be for TLC, all these three deserve to be in a match for WWE Championship at the grandest stage of them all, Wrestlemania. But perhaps it will be only a one on one match. So who is going out?

R Truth will be returning within a few weeks and that can result in a feud which can keep The Miz busy even up to Wrestlemania. R Truth has been an interesting character right now, and probably will work very well as a face. The feud between him and Miz has all the potential in the world of becoming interesting but does it need to continue till Wrestlemania? Dolph Ziggler too can very well be busy fighting or avoiding Zack Ryder for the United States Championship up until Wrestlemania and then having the big pay off as Zack Ryder finally wins this title at Wrestlemania. But does it need to happen at Wrestlemania? Clearly, there is a greater good that will be achieved by keeping either of the two out of their most probable feuds. Or is it?

What if CM Punk finds another credible opponent for the big day? What if that person happens to be returning on the second day of January next year? What if....and here is where it all changes, what if that person is NOT CHRIS JERICHO? What if that video package is suggesting the return of the most obvious candidate in Undertaker? What if he comes out, despite of all the cryptic messages that he has sent, outside the gimmick of deadman? What if he wants to bow out as himself? What if he returns as biker-taker or just pure Mark Callaway? That is a stretch and probably will be a spoilsport but CM Punk is known for dropping pipebombs and he will have a huge one in his hand and what if he uses as a fuel in the feud, that fateful incident?

Naaaaah.....I agree, that’s not happening.

John Laurinaitis

He is a terminator. He was literally born out of that epic shoot promo. No one outside of the news reporters was aware of his existence before then. He has no history before that event. Has he come for one special purpose? He walked out at the most successful event in a long time – Money in the bank. He didn’t take too long to be noticed.

An entire storyline was begun, built, developed and then scrapped just to give him the spotlight. No, Triple H was not the Undertaker who buried everyone, it was John Laurinaitis. Vince McMahon, CM Punk, Kevin Nash and Triple H, every one of them were used to throw the spotlight on him. It might not have been meant to be that way, but that’s what the end result was. He didn’t take long time to get noticed. With no real facial expressions, very doubtable intentions, malign-looking decisions, the unbearable voice and constant goof-ups, he is a hated heel. But that is not really for right reasons. And that is why he reminds me of someone else.

The reasons why he is a hated figure in the IWC (don’t really hate that term), are the reasons I had heard for someone else when I first arrived in these parts. These reasons – not having any real talent; being booed genuinely as no one wants to see this person; this is not heel heat but real heat – these reasons make me compare him to that other person. You see, these were the arguments being made about this person, not anymore!

That person is none other than the biggest heat magnet in the WWE right now, Vicky Guerrero. Yes, yes, these were the arguments being made against her. What has happened now? People have stopped arguing their case; they have simply accepted her as a heel and not as a talentless money eater. And this makes me think, will this be the fate of John Laurinaitis too?

I actually like his character, his work. He isn’t a charismatic talker. He shows vulnerability when he fumbles or goofs up a simple sentence. He, however, does not let that affect his character. He moves on, to probably fumble later on. Look all around you, your past; don’t these people exist in real life? Yes they do. To me, he is a character drawn out of real life. This Monday, he did make things interesting. He created some interest for the match between John Cena and Zack Ryder. He made some really good matches, interesting scenarios and his attempt of taking the pictures of the individuals involved in the WWE Title match made me chuckle. In that particular case, he was interesting. More interesting than your, oh so common and repetitive suggestions, CM Punk. He was a rebel for that one night, not you Punk. He tried to go in a different direction than the company had historically gone, not you.

His intentions, however, remain doubtable. He made a move that could have affected a sort of friendship between John Cena and Zack Ryder, he has deliberately tried to stop Zack Ryder saying that he hasn’t yet earned his shot, he did that this Monday by placing him first against the almighty John Cena and then against the bad ass monster Mark Henry just so he could get a ‘future’ shot at the United States Championship. We don’t know when this ‘future’ will become present, but he at least gave Zack Ryder an opportunity. He didn’t reject the Online Petition of Zack Ryder because it was against the management choice, but because the signatures in that petition were not numerically enough. And these reasons stop him from being a full-blown heel authority figure. I would once again repeat what I have already said twice, his intentions are doubtable. They may be wrong, bad, but they may even be good. And because of this reason, he reminds me of someone else too.........

He reminds me of not a real life person, not a wrestling personality, but of the most intriguing character ever written in the fictional book. He reminds me of Severus Snape from Harry Potter series. For entire eight parts of the series, he was what John Laurinaitis is today. His actions quickly made him look like a heel, the Severus Snape I’m talking about, but never proven. He kept riding on that doubt. He may be good, he may be bad. He was never a face. He was never a heel. He was just perceived one way or the other.

Am I suggesting we are up for the biggest face turn ever encountered in the wrestling business since its inception in the seventeenth century? Hell No. But in an industry which is driven by characters, I find this character to be adding a whole new dimension in the heel-face divide.

#facepalm

If you regularly use twitter or have ever used it, you must be familiar with this term. It is used when someone completely makes a joke of himself by making a very stupid argument or if someone completely misunderstands what was said. Generally, it represents the moments of embarrassments. Here is a list of my most favourite/hated #facepalms in the wrestling today.

5. Divas Division

Every time? Every time the match has to be that short? Every time does Beth Pheonix need to lose a match by a roll up? The action is not crisp even in those two minutes. And what is with that skirt, Beth? I would consider a bikini more decent outfit than a skirt that pops out your inner-wears or shorts, in this case. That looks ugly. Please change your attire! Well at least it is not in the proportion of Angelina Love/Madison Rayne (I don’t remember the name – not the skinny one, but the homeless girl that tries to please Karen Jarret). At one point, I thought she had gone complete commando (nu*e) during that tag team match from a few weeks ago. And I am still not sure about that! May be you guys can check that match from a few weeks ago and let me know? (Cheap Plug for a wrestling show)

4. WWE Commentary

I think the only person that really manages to respond well is King Kervin – oh sorry, Jerry the King Lawler. While Josh Matthews lets it slide many a times or does not give enough fight, Booker T simply slides with Michael Cole most of the times. Jerry Lawler, however, manages to keep making Michael Cole look stupid or manages to hand a couple of lines that can make Michael Cole rephrase his words (not change his opinion). Isn’t that amusing? I have talked about responding, not calling the match, or being interesting in whatever you have to say, because that’s exactly what the role of the other three announcers is. To respond to Michael ‘The Great’ Cole.

‘You are a piece of garbage Bryan, you are a piece of garbage. Now how do you feel? You are nothing but a piece of garbage. You deserve everything you’ve got Bryan, because you are nothing but garbage’

-    Sir Michael Cole (Knighted on the day every single alive human being died a little from inside)

I get that WWE has always been about heel-face announcers, but to this extent? Really Cole, really? You justify the beating that was laid upon Booker t because he was too opinionated, and yet you can be opinionated because you are too seasoned. Booker T beating the crap out of Cody Rhodes is ambush?

I really love the TNA announce team. They are not divided in the heel-face dynamic. They are neutral. They are just announcers. They may not be great, but they don’t really need to do anything in order to look great. The majority of the task of them looking great is handled by the WWE Announce Team.

3.  Dolph Ziggler

Show Off. Show Off. Show Off.

It is not Show Off, if you can back it up.

Can you back it up? Yes you can.

Since you can back it up, it is not Show Off, right?

Then why the heck do you want to call yourself a ‘Show Off’?
 

2.  David Otunga

This was in my mind for a long time. I just didn’t find the right time to say this. Now, Hustle has beaten me to it.

Ever since David Otunga has scrapped the underwear (wrestling shorts) and donned those Harvard Law Graduate clothes, this glass has never been out of his hands. Is it an urn or something?

What is it in your glass, David? Does that taste that damn good? Is it a black magic practiced by Jennifer Hudson so that you cannot cheat on her? Does that help you remember every clause of every act that you say you have learned (or the dialogues that you are supposed to say)? Or is it to keep you alive? Because, someone has definitely sucked the life out of you

1.      John Laurinaitis

For all the praise I may have given to him in this column, I can simply not ignore this.

‘My name is Mr John Laurinaitis and I am the Executive Vice President of Talent Relations and the Interim General Manager of Raw’.

I don’t have any problem with him continuously repeating these words. I have a problem with a very little word, a prefix in that sentence. I have a problem with ‘Mr’.

Who in this world refers to oneself as ‘Mr’? Not women, neither children and nor do men.

See, it is when others refer you, do they use the prefix ‘Mr’. Well, some of you may not be used to being referred to as ‘Mr’ but that’s okay. The point here is that you can go to Britain, find a person who is in dire need of help, you would offer them some help, and they wouldn’t take your help for a simple reason that you did not refer to them as ‘Mr’ when you offered them help. I used Britain because Britishers are known to have the biggest egos on the world. Even they won’t refer to themselves as ‘Mr’. Sure, they may go all out of the way and compel you to refer to them as ‘Your Highness, the greatest to ever live, the King of......’ you get the picture. But none of them will ever say, ‘My name is Mr John Laurinaitis’. They will simply say, ‘My name is John Laurinaitis’.

Well, that’s all for this edition folks! See you next time J

Coffee Table Thoughts

Coffee Table Thoughts

I am here on my desk, looking at the big screen (The PC, not the TV) having a cuppa of coffee and letting the thoughts roam free. There isn’t any particular thought that I want to write about. Just a few topics I would like to discuss on the fly.

Wrestling

Wrestling has come a long way. Or rather, my life as a wrestling fan has come a long way. I started watching the product when Stone Cold Steve Austin and The Rock were feuding over the Intercontinental title. DX was making every segment entertaining. Mankind was a likable fool. Undertaker was as dangerous as ever. Triple H was growing steadily as the leader of DX. Vince McMahon was driving me crazy with anger by all his tactics. Hardy Boys vs. Edge and Christian vs. Dudley Boys; and many more. This was also the time where I would get someone or the other for watching the shows. I would get someone or the other to discuss wrestling with in school. It was cool.

Then the viewing became sporadic. I witnessed the whole decade with little glimpses whenever I caught the show on TV. I witnessed the debut of Goldberg; the beginning and the end of Brock Lesnar; continuous attempts by Paul Heyman of stalling the progress of Chris Benoit; Evolution of Evolution; The hilarious Eddie Guerrero; The Ultimate underdog; Kurt Angle’s matches; Booker T and Goldust; Scot Steiner and having no idea of what he was saying; the unmasking of Kane; the day Edge won a four-way elimination match to be named the number one contender for the World Championship; the rise and rise of John Cena; and many more. This was the time I didn’t catch the progress of the storylines. It was a few weeks of watching the wrestling and then months of break. Just like how I study; studying for a few minutes and then taking break for a few hours. At this point of time, there was no reason for me to get into any conversation about wrestling with anyone.

In the middle of the year 2010, things started to change. I started pursuing other methods of enjoying wrestling. I searched for wrestlers that I liked. I wanted to know where they were, what had become of them. Wikipedia became my new favourite place. Unlike the other times, I searched for what had gone by in previous years instead of checking out what was taking place in the present. And I found out a few facts.

I found out about the way Vince created the empire that is WWE; how Wrestlemania is the biggest show of wrestling; that Triple H and Stephanie McMahon are actually married, Stone Cold Steve Austin’s neck injury; Montreal Screwjob; Chris Benoit death; the Monday Night wars; the Invasion storyline and how lucky I was to miss that; the drug problems in the industry; and many more. All this knowledge further increased my interest in this form of entertainment. I started checking out various wrestling web-sites and weekly results. And again began watching the wrestling product online through youtube and stuff like that because I really have no control over the TV at my home. At this point of time, I am usually subjected to jokes and humour because of the way in which I follow the wrestling product.

All the non-watchers are allowed to not feel entertained by the wrestling product because nothing is meant for everyone. They don’t need to appreciate the effort put in by the wrestlers. There may be some shows which they may feel passionate about, but I have no interest in. Like a musical or dance competition.

What bothers me is the fact that they consider wrestling to be a non-worthy entertainment for everyone. The common argument that they make is that wrestling is fake. My question: so what?

Aren’t sitcoms fake? Aren’t the big budgeted Hollywood action flicks fake? Hell, every romantic movie is fake too. Does that stop us from liking them? No it doesn’t.

Wrestling is a product that has a rich history, has a unique combination of entertainment and sports. There is an emotional attachment between the wrestlers and the fans. And as fake as the product may be, the action is not. The wrestling moves may have been designed so as to cause minimum injury, but if they were to be practiced upon us, we would surely break a bone. The action that gets served to us every week on free television and pay per view (we get that free), is far better than anything that is seen in Fast and Furious series. What is the action in those movies? A scene that has been edited so much so that a two minute sequence does not have a continuous shot of more than 10 seconds? Well, that’s just my personal opinion and many would disagree with me. But the point I am trying to make is that it serves some beautiful action that can match the entertainment value of any car-chase sequence of a high rated movie.

I am a wrestling fan, and I will be one for the rest of my life. Unless if CM Punk starts jobbing out on Superstars.

The TNA Story

I was behind Robert Roode when he was being built for the World Heavy Weight Championship match at Bound for Glory. When the reason for his loss at the said event was revealed to be nothing but the personal opinion of Hulk Hogan, it angered me. When James Storm won the championship in the next Impact Tapings, I was laughing at the attempts of Eric Bishoff and Hulk Hogan to look smart by their comments. When Robert Roode won the championship from James Storm by turning heel, I started raising eyebrows. When I watched the last Impact tapings where James Storm went from Robert Roode to Samoa Joe to Mr Anderson to Bully Ray and finally setting his eyes on A J Styles as a possible suspect that jumped him from behind and caused the amount of blood loss that if it were money could have only made someone a millionaire, my hopes were raised. When Kurt Angle came from under the ring and attacked James Storm, I was laughing out loud. They have taken every wrong step that there was to take, they have ran faster with the storylines than Bolt and they have turned the storylines more than the curves of Kate Winslet and yet, here we are, with two main event feuds with four most righteous people involved in. AJ Styles, Bobby Roode, James Storm and Kurt Angle are going to be great television, promo wise and wrestling wise. I am looking forward to all of these.

The Survivor Series

We all had predicted the card long before it was declared. Our prediction had begun before Night of Champions. We were seeing before our very own eyes, a storyline develop. The disgruntled, fired employees – Kevin Nash, The Miz, R-Truth. The disgruntled, employed employees – Christian, Dolph Ziggler, David Otunga, Jack Swagger, Cody Rhodes, Wade Barret. We were hoping for this year’s Survivor series to regain its former glory. We were hoping for and looking forward to the best possible Survivor Series match in many years. But then the storylines were given a quick fix when clearly it was not required. Rock and John Cena were moved out of the traditional survivor series elimination match and were placed in a tag team match that is nowhere near as important as it should have been. And then we were informed about the most craved survivor series match listing by the announcers in a 20 second promo. And then to make the matters worse, the Team captains were named as Randy Orton and Wade Barret? There was no problem with Randy Orton being named the team captain given the fact that he is the most high profile player in that match, but Wade Barret? And that too when Cody Rhodes was also on Team Barret and actually was having a feud with Randy Orton right at that time? All the wrongs were done right by a simple promo between Randy Orton, Wade Barret and Christian on Smackdown last week. Randy Orton explained that he did not like to be in any team let alone leading it. However, he is not a quitter and if there is anything he is going to do in a team than that is to lead. Wade Barret stating that he is a natural born leader, that people always gravitated towards him. Christian saying that he is a leader and he thinks Wade Barret is a true leader too. The feud began. Add to this the fact that there are many interim feuds going on between the players in both teams, Sheamus and Christian (who will be in Barret’s corner), Sheamus and Wade Barret (the backstage beating), Cody Rhodes and Randy Orton, Dolph Ziggler and Mason Ryan, Hunico and Sin Cara; this might indeed be the match to look forward to the most. And that is not only because of the feuds involved but because of the wrestlers involved. Randy Orton has been wrestler of the year in many a fans’ books for this year, Wade Barret and Sheamus will provide hard-hitting style, Jack Swagger, Dolph Ziggler will take care of the technical side, Cody Rhodes has provided many good to decent matches through-out the year, Sin Cara, Hunico and Kofi Kingston will handle the high flying style and Mason Ryan will try to hit one or two power moves. Plus there are chances of shenanigans on part of Christian.

Well, that’s all for tonight folks!