Coffee Table Thoughts – Olay Olay Olay Olay Olay

Coffee Table Thoughts – Olay Olay Olay Olay Olay

Welcome to the Coffee Table folks, I am here to share my thoughts on a recent ROH show that I watched while my books craved for my attention and another day of my much needed studies got wasted.

Ring of Honor: Road Rage: 15 April 2012

Mike Bennett and that Canadian

The action is set as the first match is between Lance Storm and Mike Bennettt. There is a promo from Mike Bennett before the match starts and one thing I notice is the pre-match run down of the stats. It’s a rather interesting way of building up a match that major wrestling promotions have forgotten. It was used on Smackdown a few years ago giving the details of the height, weight and other attributes of the wrestlers but not used now-a-days. I would love to see these stats return to the big league. Big question mark is shown in the Code of Honor section of the stat against Mike Bennett giving us the impression that it is highly likely that he may disrespect his opponent in some way.

                                 

The match is not too long but quite an impressive feat. Mike Bennett is joined by his manager – Maria and announcers put her over throughout the show as being very smart and knowing the intricacies of the business as well as being aware of the in ring product called wrestling. And sure enough she does show how helpful she can be to her client which I believe is her boyfriend too, when she holds the leg of Lance Storm when he is about to hit a German Suplex from the turn buckle.

It is not a full blown finisher after finisher after finisher match that Ring of Honor of today has become so infamous for. Much of the match is submission wrestling and most of it came from Lance Storm. But it does have its fair share of finishers and false finishes.

The end result is a beautiful match which changes pace quite a many times. Mike Bennett is good in ring and the promo he cut was entertaining too. He has all the attributes of a star. It would be interesting to see where his career will head. Also, he is quite tall as compared to some other ROH wrestlers.

Lance Storm also cuts a fierce promo after the match. He lost the match and then afterwards Mike Bennett offered his hand to Lance Storm but hit him with a sick finisher instead. Lance Storm showed a great deal of emotion in the promo and asked for another match. He said he sees potential in Mike Bennett but needs to teach him some lessons. He also said that he will not leave this business lying on his back. (The modified promo in the recap form is shown in the April 21 edition of the ROH and it is one of the better promos I have seen this year.)

Recap Recap

They showed a recap of the match between Briscoe Brothers and another tag team afterward and the action was superb. It was fast paced and hard hitting. It was just a few final minutes of the match in the recap but it was enjoyable.

They also showed a recap of the match between Davey Richards, Roderick Strong and Eddie Edwards. There were obviously some hard hitting stuff there but the tag team action was much better than this.

OMG! That’s a Shoot

They showed a press conference afterwards where the authority figure of the Ring of Honor Wrestling Jim Cornette and the current Ring of Honor World Champion Davey Richards were being interviewed. It was soon interrupted by Kevin Steen who seems to be everybody’s favourite heel at the moment. It is becoming a more popular way of building feuds but it is becoming a rather common way of building feuds too. Kevin Steen challenges Davey Richards to a title match which he accepts. Jim Cornette does not like the idea and tries to talk Davey out of it. And while he is trying to make Davey understand his view point, Kevin Steen is continuously mocking Davey Richards.

Richards threatens Cornnette that he would leave the company if he does not make this match official. Jim Cornette finally agrees to it and then goes on to say in an interview that he knows of all the accusations that he has been bombarded with in regards to keeping Kevin Steen off of Davey Richards. He has been accused that of trying to keep Davey Richards safe from Steen but the truth is that he believes Davey Richards can beat him anytime, anywhere. The problem is he does not trust Kevin Steen and does not know what kind of game he may play.

Out of the three, Jim Cornette was the most effective in setting up the feud. His interview promo was spot on for emphasising on how important the match is. Kevin Steen was quite a trouble in the interruption that he caused and can gather heat genuinely. But he seems to be a little unpolished in the same way as Daniel Bryan. Daniel Bryan is managing to get all the heat and popularity by his effort but there is some sort of rookie-ness in his promos.

I think Davey Richards was very straight forward in his promo and seemed like he was just repeating a dialogue after memorising it. Although he did try to bring some sort of emotion in the threat that he gave to his boss, it all came forth as rather fake. But the overall impact of the segment was well received.

Highlight of the Night: Olay Olay Olay Olay Olay

Lastly, there was a match between Kevin Steen and a returning El Generico. It seemed that he was earlier injured by Kevin Steen himself and has come back to exact revenge in a Last Man Standing match. I am not sure about the storyline though, it is what I was able to understand from the show.

The match was nothing short of amusing. Many beautiful spots were filled throughout the match. The match starts when El Generico jumps on to Kevin Steen without waiting for the bell to ring. The crowd was red hot for the entire match. And how cool is it to have a crowd sing for you to support you? El Generico’s catchphrase or whatever it is has got to be the best thing going in wrestling today. The ‘What’ chants are irritating, the ‘Yes’ chants are interesting right now but have a potential to be the worst nightmare for wrestling fans world-wide. But these chants are chants, they are not a song, whereas El Generico’s Olay....... Olay......... Olay Olay Olay........... is a beautiful song to pump up the performers and the crowd. Wow! I have never seen anything like that in whole of my wrestling viewing career!

If Shawn Michaels was to special guest referee this match, he would get a heart attack. There are sick moves after sick moves in this match. It’s all very different from what we see on Raw and Smackdown which is a much tamed product.

But the highlight of the match is when Jimmy Jacobs interfered and then bloody stabbed El Generico on the face! I am not sure what he used or where he hit him exactly but I am not going to recheck. These things should be banned from wrestling! It can cause a serious injury to the wrestler who is getting stabbed if there is some mistake and it can kill an eye! You understand what I mean? It is this part of wrestling that I simply hate! Even if it is fully protected and the device may be gimmicked but you can’t show these kind of stuff to children or those who haven’t grown despite their age! What is it that cannot be achieved by a chair shot?

Anyways, what ensued was a very rare kind of chemistry between two wrestlers. Kevin Steen and Jimmy Jacobs were partners and it showed in everything that they did. You need to see it to believe it. The way they stare and not stare at each other, the way they hug and not hug each other, this partnership is reflected simplistically and yet unambiguously. It is very evident despite not going overboard with it.

We have seen Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger come together for matches for better part of the year but there is no sense of chemistry between the two. They may both be great wrestlers in their own right, but they are not a good tag team and I understood it by a simple 5 minute segment between Kevin Steen and Jimmy Jacobs. See, Dolph and Jack may have been tagging together, they may interfere in one another’s matches to help each other out but they aren’t showing any sort of chemistry. By this time, they should have been brothers or enemies. But there is no real progress in their chemistry. And it does not need to have a storyline to progress in that department. They should watch this segment to learn how to develop chemistry amongst one another.

Twitter-Update

Kofi Kingston replied to me!!! And blocked me too.     

Spring Cleaning

Coffee Table Thoughts – Spring Cleaning

Hello everyone, welcome to the column that comes out wearing the brightest coloured John Cena T-shirt and still gets unnoticed.

I would like to give my thoughts on everybody’s favourite topic to assess at the moment, Spring Cleaning.

All of the choices I have made are legitimate and I can sense these are the most likely cases for Ban Hammer. Err...Releases.

1.     John Cena

This is the guy they had trusted their entire company with. This is the guy they have pushed the most in the last decade. This is the guy that they chose over Brock Lesnar (or after Brock Lesnar, whichever way you want to take it). After gazillion of opportunities to get over with the fans, this guy is still finding his groove. His loss at the hands of The Rock at Wrestlemania is quite telling of where the company sees him. Plus, Company didn’t see interested in punishing Brock Lesnar for the legit shot to the mouth he gave to John Cena. It’s very clear that John Cena is going to lose to Brock Lesnar in the next PPV. Now that you have the guy that you wanted to be the face of your company originally, why settle with the second rate?

But he has become too big a name to be let gone that easily. So they will go the safe route by having him legit injured at the hands of Brock Lesnar. He can always come back in a year or two. Plus this is an all parties happy situation. Fans will be happy to see him finally get out of their screen, Rey Mysterio will get better negotiations, Brock will not have much of competition, John Cena will have a chance to reflect upon his career and find out that there is life beyond WWE and above all, John Cena’s wife and family will finally get what they always wanted.

2.     Wade Barret

See, I get it. He is scheduled to win the Money in the Bank match (Isn’t it funny, they will change the day/event on which the match will be held only for him) but so was Drew McIntyre! He never won it, did he? Now this guy was up for a huge push at Wrestlemania but got injured. And now, there are already a lot of big guys which can replace him. And also, there is a fair chance still that William Regal may come back to the ring given the WWE’s intent on bringing in the old stars. And even if William Regal is not going to come back, Drew McIntyre can always become the first ‘British’ World Champion!!

3.     Dolph Ziggler

He’s a great wrestler. He’s quite good on the mic. Has the personality, the charisma which one would want from a World Champion. But see, that is the problem! There are not enough opportunities for the World Championship material guys. Alberto Del Rio is in line for the championship run, Ryback will be in the running soon along with Cody Rhodes, Lord Tensai and Brodus Clay because, you know, everyone has to be in the main event. Why would they even be in the company if not? Here’s what’s wrong with Dolph Ziggler, he’s not content with the World Championship matches at Royal Rumble, and he’s not content with the multi man/woman matches at Wrestlemania. But you know what’s even worse? He doesn’t cry foul over it. He likes to take it professionally and tries to steal the show in whatever few minutes that he gets. It’s not how the WWE likes it! You better bitch and complain, otherwise how would the WWE management come to know that you are hungry for success?

4.     USOs

If they can’t convince their father to show up with them on Smackdown for a smaller price, they certainly can’t get the WWE universe behind them. Besdies, Rikishi did so much for The Rock. He couldn’t do this for his own sons?

5.     Triple H

Come on now, do I really have to explain this? Triple H is the son-in-law of Vince McMahon is a fact. But there is an even bigger fact that you have missed! Marriages come to a halt, they turn into divorces! It’s a proven fact in the wrestling industry! Besides, it’s about time that Shane McMahon realises the mistake he has made, goes to Himalayas for some soul searching and comes right back at the fore front of the things. And I’m sure if he ever decided to come back, he will not be satisfied with only Smackdown. He would want everything! So what better way to do just that than to create some forced trouble in her dear sister’s marriage?

6.     Sheamus

To accompany his work-out buddy.

Now to end this column, I have prepared a variety of desserts just for you fine folks:

·         I am not in the least interested in the Ryback character. I would have liked him come back as Skip Sheffield. At least the name was cool.

·         I do not understand how TNA audience works. TNA is getting better and better at it’s shows (minus the Bischoff angle, naturally) and the audience keeps getting thinner and thinner.

·         Tito Ortiz indicated that he would like to join WWE after his UFC/MMA career was over. I don’t know him nor have I ever seen him but seems to be quite a celebrity. Are we seeing an opposite of the recent trend? We hear that there are too many MMA fighters who went to MMA instead of staying with wrestling and now there is a returning trend. Brock Lesnar came back from MMA. Alberto Del Rio supposedly is an MMA guy. That’s Cool!!

·         I am impressed by Damien Sandows (pardon the spelling, if it is wrong) and his promos. I haven’t seen his other work in 2006 or something but I like his promos. It would be interesting to see how he presses the universe’s buttons. And he reminds me of the Straight Edge Messiah! 

Dream Matches - Entry 1

Dream Match - Entry 1

Wrestling is an industry to test the strength and wrestling prowess of those who admire. Many a times we find ourselves in a dilemma as to who is our most favourite or that out of chosen two, who would outshine the other. Here, I will try to give my thoughts on some of those rare match-ups where we can go either way of the fence.

Arn Anderson vs Ric Flair

I am not going to sit here and proclaim to be a great historian of the wrestling business. I am not aware of half the things of my own wrestling viewing time and to call oneself an expert on the subject, one would need much more knowledge than that. On that premise, this choice of a match seems more of a valiant effort by a rejected under-aged kid, to look ‘cool’.

I would be lying if I would say I am flattered by the performance of Arn Anderson on the mic or on the mat because I have never seen him perform. I have seen Ric Flair perform, but I am sure none of you believe he can be his former self at this old age – in TNA – where I have seen him perform.

Sure I might have streamed a match or two or a promo or two but that does not justify my selection for this match as a Dream match. Especially when I came to know that this feud and this match has already taken place. Dream matches are those which are yet to take place, right?

I completely get your point. And still, I choose this match as a dream match.

You see, even John Cena vs Undertaker would classify as a dream match despite it already having taken place. The reason behind this is that the feud, the overall conditions were different at the time when it took place. John Cena had not yet become even the rising star that he would become through this feud. Whereas now; he is not only a star but ‘the star’. There is a difference. Undertaker’s legacy was there even then but over the course of the half-decade, it has grown to even more epic proportions. They are both legitimate legends now and have never collided as such. Hence, John Cena vs Undertaker still remains a dream match. In the same way, Arn Anderson vs Ric Flair remains a dream match. And this, even without changing the feud they had the first time around. I would go by the absolute same storyline they had when they actually feuded. Arn Anderson claimed that Ric Flair had held him down for all those years they were the part of Four Horsemen. That is indeed the base on which the whole feud should take place/ should have taken place.

But if the match is the same, the feud is the same, then why is this match a dream match, you ask?

Let me first tell you where I have seen Arn Anderson. I have seen him being made a puppet by Stone Cold Steve Austin. A puppet. Sure everyone gets a beating in the hands of Stone Cold but being made to look like a puppet? What does that tell you of the status of Arn Anderson on the overall history of the business?

You see, Arn Anderson is considered a phenomenal talent. He had all the tools to be the greatest ever. He had the technical prowess, the moves to go along with that, the mic skills that can put Dolph Ziggler to shame, the intensity that can only be matched by Mick Foley and the charisma. He had everything. He even had that one particular aspect which is the most determinate factor of all, the drawing power. As a part of Four Horsemen, he surely drew well.

But he never became the Superstar that he deserved to be. He just remained a megastar. The one who would appear in the top 10 list of the smarkiest smarks but never on a top 10 list of a mark.

Look no further than Batista vs Triple H storyline from 2005. Batista was the modern day Enforcer. Triple H was the modern day Nature Boy. Batista became a fan favourite that many can only dream to be. What if this was given to a man who actually had all the better tools to handle such a huge fan support? He would go on to become the greatest of the great.

What separates Arn Anderson from other greats in the business who never won the big one – namely Rowdy Roddy Piper, Mr Perfect, Ted Dibiase and others – is that none of them had a built in feud in their careers. In the end, even they could have taken that final step towards greatness that no doubt they were deserving of but none of them had that one competitor who was just so right. Mr Perfect could have won the big belt from Bret Hart, Roddy Piper could have won it from Hulk Hogan but none would be as intense as Arn taking the big gold belt from Ric Flair. The personal history between the two is in itself so epic and storied that there was no chance for it to fail. And it surprises me to a great extent, why this has not taken place in reality.

I would want Arn Anderson to go over Ric Flair clean for the World Heavyweight Championship, when it made the most sense. And it could have been at anytime during the 80s or early 90s when they were both relevant. And we could have seen a face so strong that rivalled Stone Cold Steve Austin and Hulk Hogan in terms of popularity and overall impact in the world of professional wrestling.

The Way Ahead

The Way Ahead

Wrestlemania season has just ended. Some are happy with it. Some are not so. And some are outright angry with what was put on show on the grandest stage of them all on the very lovable April fool’s day.

But the wrestling world lives on.

Some got the chance to shine on this day. Some didn’t.

But forget all of that. Because the New Year is about to begin!

It was very nice to see some positivity from the young undercard wrestlers of the WWE after the event was over. Usually, we get an angry banter from the young guys. But this year, almost everyone expressed a similar feeling. They are all determined and hopeful to be on the card for next year’s Wrestlemania. Because they have now seen the end of an era!

It is evident then, that they don’t read the dirt-sheets.

Biggest Match Ever!!!!!!!!!

The plans are already in motion to bring to us the biggest match in the history of WWE! If you thought this year’s Wrestlemania showcased the biggest match in the history of the WWE, you are completely wrong! You will see the biggest match ever in the next year on the occasion of Wrestlemania 29!

Nothing ever gets bigger than this.

Any guesses?

I’ll give you a hint.

It features an already established star/former star in it.

Not a clue?

Well, here’s presenting you the biggest match ever in the history of the WWE:

EVERY FUCKING MATCH IN WRESTLEMANIA 29

No seriously, that’s true!

There will be The Rock, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Brock Lesnar, Batista, John Cena, Randy Orton, CM Punk and probably even Triple H!

Just look at that list. That’s ridiculous! This is what Wrestlemania has become. A place and time which is completely different from the regular WWE programming. They are constantly in search of the permutations and combinations which they have never tried; they are in search of the biggest stars that have never faced off against each other and when they don’t find such combinations, they just put together a match we have already seen. Here’s a trick. Why don’t you guys just put a big screen in that New Jersey Arena and telecast Wrestlemania 17 all over again on the day of Wrestlemania?

And Curt Hawkins thinks he will be on the Wrestlemania card next year! Yeah sure, Curt. Here’s a message from your buddy Tyler Reks, “We are friends now. But we won’t be friends come next year! (Because it is a tag team, and there is only one way a tag team can go in the WWE – the split!) We have gone through a lot. We have been friends and we have been enemies. It’s time to finally find out who is better amongst us. And it cannot be done at any lesser stage. Our rivalry will be remembered for ages. Our match will be remembered in awe by millions. It will be the biggest match ever. See you at Wrestlemania 29 ......................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................in the dark match!”

Lucky 2 Many?

In 2010, it was very clear that WWE’s future was in danger. Several top stars retired/ partly retired in a very short period.

There was a clear urgency to make new stars. There was a need to give opportunity to their young stars. And that they did. That is until Wrestlemania.

In 2011, the only two young talents that got the chance to shine were The Miz and Cody Rhodes. There were a few stars that had had a great year in 2010-2011 but the opportunity was given to only the two of them. It can be said that CM Punk too got his chance and that may be he wasn’t that established by that time but he was a 3 time world champion already!

Then there was this Alberto Del Rio. The young, arrogant Mexican Aristocrat. It was clear in almost everyone’s mind that he wasn’t ready for that spotlight as yet.

Speaking of those stars that had a great year in 2010-2011, John Morrison, Dolph Ziggler, Wade Barret and Daniel Bryan were left off the card or given absolutely nothing to work with. The Miz was in an important position but he played a third wheel in a feud that was supposed to be centred on him. Cody got his chance, though.

And 12 months later, regardless of any other superstar that may or may not have improvised their status with the company, Cody got his chance. Again. Think about it again. Sheamus, Daniel Bryan, Dolph Ziggler, Zack Ryder, Santino Marrela, Miz were all devoid of their Wrestlemania moment. But Cody got his chance.

He got his chance to shine, while Dolph Ziggler was placed along with 11 others, Daniel Bryan lost his chance all over again, Wade Barret lost his health (which is purely coincidental but still) and John Morrison simply lost his job.

I don’t know whether that is an indication of the company’s choice or a mere coincidence. But it is clear as water that Cody’s Wrestlemania resume continues to build whereas every other young talented star gets sidelined one time or the other (Mostly all the time).

Sure, there are better things planned for Daniel Bryan. Sure, there are better days ahead for Sheamus. Sure, Dolph Ziggler will get to showcase his talent night in and night out all over again. Sure, The Miz will get many opportunities to shine again.

But.  Not at Wrestlemania.

And therefore, my dear geek friends, let the bandwagon slow down, let the hype be settled down, for the age of new generation has arrived, and you will get to see it ONLY at this time of the year, on the NON - Road to Wrestlemania!

The best time of the year, has just begun!